Dildeep and Mooly Go to the Country

Dildeep and Mooly go to The Country

 Dildeep and Mooly are brother and sister.  Mooly is Dildeep’s sister and Dildeep is Mooly’s brother.  They are little, and a bit bigger.  Mooly is little and Dildeep is a bit bigger.  Dildeep can nearly reach the middle shelf.

They live in a house, in town, where there are no Horses or Cows or Giraffes or Dinosaurs.  Dildeep likes Dinosaurs but he has never seen one.  He likes them anyway.  He likes the way they bash cars and eat aeroplanes.  And he likes ‘Banjo’.  Banjo is his cat.

One day Dildeep is bored: It is raining.  He says to Mooly “Let’s go across the sea to ‘The Country’, that’s where the Dinosaurs and Giraffes live.  Mummy told me.”  Mooly wants to see a Ninosaur, an’ a Raffe an’ a Norse too, but not a cow.

“Can we be back for tea?” says Mooly, “Mummy said we are havin sossgis today”.  Mooly likes sausages.  And potatoes and bananas, but not peas or blackberries.  She doesn’t like the pippy bits in blackberries.  Dildeep doesn’t like lots, especially not crusts, mushrooms, spinach and apple peel.  He likes snacks, but not cheese.

“I don’t know,” says Dildeep, “but we need to take lots of snacks, so I’ll get them from the fridge, and the sausages – in case.”  He gets some snack drinks and a yoghurt pot.

Mooly doesn’t like the idea of having no proper tea, but packs her bag with her two bestest ever dolls, Baby and Tilly, and her rain hat, and a baby wipe, and her book about how butterflies eat cabbages, and a ribbon that came round her Christmas present.  Dildeep packs his Transformer Killerator Zomboid Drone, some colouring pens and a piece of paper, a football (in case the giraffes want to play), a book about how to speak dinosaur and the walking-about telephone from the kitchen.  And a toothbrush.

“Do they have toilets in The Country?” asks Mooly.  “There might not be any paper, like in the supermarket yesterday.”  “No,” says Dildeep, “they don’t have things like toilets, or baths, or spare underpants or anything.  You’ll have to go now, before we leave.”

When Mooly comes back from the bathroom she says, “How will we go without Mummy seeing? She’ll never let us go to The Country without her,” half hoping that she won’t have to go at all.  Mooly isn’t very sure about there being no toilet or spare underpants.

“It’s alright,” says Dildeep, in his most bravest ‘I’m nearly old enough for school, so I know a lot’, voice. “Mummy will be busy with the ironing for hours, and then she said she was going to make us a cake.  We can go, and be back, before she gets to the end of the sheets”.  The sheets always take a long time because Mummy has to keep stopping to get Banjo off the washing heap.  Banjo likes to play in the washing.

Mooly thinks for a bit and then says “But how will we get there? My trike is broken.”  Dildeep sometimes thinks that Mooly is so completely silly that she doesn’t understand anything at all.  He puts his hands on his hips and rolls his eyes round (he’s seen his Daddy do that) “You can’t go to The County by trike, it’s too far.  We have to go across the sea in a raft and then walk for ages.”  He thinks there might be a bus, but he isn’t very sure so he doesn’t say.

Mooly’s bottom lip sticks out, and she puts one hand up to her eye.  Mooly knows this always works with Mummy, but it doesn’t work with Dildeep.  “Don’t be such a baby,” he says, “it will be a ‘venture.”

“Will there be ‘nakes and ‘piders, I don’t like ‘piders,” says Mooly.  She almost says Boo Hoo, too.

“Yes,” says Dildeep, “snakes and spiders and grerillas, and a hittapoperus.  But it’s OK ‘cos I’ve got my water gun.  Snakes and spiders don’t like water.  I’ll squirt at them if they come too near.”

Soon the raft is ready.  They have a big sheet for a sail, which they have taken off the spare bed so that Mummy won’t notice it has gone.  Dildeep jumps onto the raft, and it rocks quite a lot.  Mooly is frightened it might tip over and Dildeep has to help her get in.  “Cast Off,” Dildeep orders, in his salty seadog captain’s voice.  Mooly doesn’t know what ‘Cast Off’ means, so Dildeep has to do it himself.  They begin to paddle furiously out into the stream and down towards the sea.

After a while Dildeep says “I’m hungry, let’s have a snack.  We can stop over there and make a camp.”  Mooly is quite hungry too, so they paddle for the shore and pull the raft up onto the beach.  They aren’t allowed to play with matches, so Dildeep makes a fire by rubbing sticks together and Mooly unpacks Baby and Tilly to share her snack with them.

“Are we at The Country now” says  Mooly as she tucks into her Apple Crumble and Wheatflake bar (with no added sugar she can hear her Mummy say).  “No, not yet” says Dildeep, “it’s over there a bit, and round the corner past the deadly crushing rocks and the whale cave.”

“Tilly’s tired,” says Mooly “she wants to stay here until tea time.  Can we?”

“No.  I want to go to The Country.  If you don’t go to the Country with me I won’t speak to you ever, never, again.  Even when you come to big school with me.”  So they pack up their camp, and put everything back on the raft.  Dildeep thinks it will be a good idea to take the fire, in case it gets cold near the whale cave.  He’s heard Daddy talk about a fire bucket, so he puts the fire into a bucket and lifts it onto the raft.  “Cast Off”, Dildeep commands.  This time Mooly knows she has to untie the cord from Dildeep’s dressing gown, but she throws it onto the shore instead of bringing it into the raft.  Dildeep is annoyed, because Mummy will wonder what has happened to it.  Soon the current takes them fast into the deep blue sea and sweeps them round the headland and past the whale cave.  Dildeep gets his water gun ready, but the whale must be asleep, because they don’t see even a bubble or a burp from under the waves.  On and on they go, until Mooly is so tired she falls asleep in the bottom of the raft.

She wakes up suddenly when Dildeep shouts “Land Ho! We’re there, look Mooly, we’ve arrived at The Country.”   Below the great grey cliffs there is a small beach where they land the raft and lift out the fire bucket.  “We have to explore up that path and find the dinosaurs and giraffes.”  “And the ‘orses too,” says Mooly “after a snack.”

The climb up the cliffs is very hard, but soon they are at the top and there, ahead, just above the tree tops, they see a tall funny head with two bumpy bits on top.  “Look”, says Mooly.  She is excited.  “It’s a ‘raffe”.  Can we feed it some of my snack?”  “S’pect so”, says Dildeep, “but only a bit ‘cos they might not like it and then we might get into trouble.”

Mooly shows the giraffe to Baby and Tilly.  They are a bit scared and Mooly has to hold them very tight, but they like it really, especially the long eyelashes and big, big, curly tongue.  The ‘raffe licks them.  Then Dildeep sees something else tall above the trees; a big tall neck like a giraffe, but it is all green and scaly and it has big TEETH.

“Help”, says Dildeep as he grabs his water gun “it’s a dinosaur and it’s going to attack us!”  Mooly screams and clings to her brother’s legs.  “ROAR” goes the dinosaur. Squirt, Squirt, goes the water gun into the flashing jaws.  Dildeep transforms his Killerator Zomboid Drone which launches itself into the fight, biting and bashing the dinosaur.  Then Mooly has a brainwave and throws the sausages to the dinosaur, which eats them so fast that it falls over dead with indigestion.  “Gosh, that was close, says Dildeep.  My gun is out of water.  We’d better get back to the raft, and go home before we see any more monsters.”   “But we didn’t see a Norse” yet says Mooly, a bit disappointed.

Back in the sea the raft flies along under the big sail, but the fire bucket tips over in the bumpy waves and soon the raft is on fire from end to end.  “Oh help”, says Dildeep “what shall we do?”  He is very afraid, but Mooly is very clever and uses the bucket to take water from the sea and put out the fire.

Then Dildeep says, “Help! Now there is too much water in the raft and we’re sinking!”  But Mooly uses the same bucket to take the water out of the raft and put it back into the sea.  “Oh Mooly, you are clever,” says Dildeep, “you’ve saved us both, with the sausage eating dinosaur and the fire.  Well done you!  You are a great explorer.” And he gives her a big hug.  Mooly is very proud.

Sure enough, they creep back into their room just as Mummy finishes the cake.  She calls through from the kitchen “Hallo you two, you’re very quiet.  It’s nearly tea time – have you seen the sausages? I thought they were in the fridge?”  She comes into the room, but Dildeep and Mooly are fast asleep on the floor.

She thinks to herself, “What a mess!  Just look at that sheet.  What are the sausages doing in here, and why have they got teeth marks all over them?  And where is Dildeep’s dressing gown cord?  Why are the walls all wet, and what is that bucket doing on the bed?  Never mind, I’ll ask them tomorrow; maybe we can all take a trip to the country.  That will keep them amused!

© Andrew Gold 2007